Capture Me:: Tune My Heart

Again, as always, I've been waiting for words to encase the convictions rattling around in my heart.

Solid words. and shiny.

Like some fancy silver rattle, welded tight, so that the accumulating thoughts don't spill loose like choking hazards.

And, as always, waiting around for captivating, entertaining, fascinating, safe, shiny words-- waiting for confidence in my story-telling ability or depth of insight-- has me backed into a corner.

They're always going to be broken, these words of mine. Incomplete.

In finding God faithful to provide the wisdom I seek earnestly and humbly (when I manage to assume such a posture), I so desire to write down the lesson learned. Let's be honest, I'm usually learning these things the hard way and I want to remember them well--to relay them here well-- because of all of their struggles, it was the Israelites' forgetfulness that most often got them cornered.

"Are you not the One who dried up the sea,

the waters of the great deep;

that made the depths of the sea a road

for the redeemed to cross over?

So the ransomed of the Lord shall return,

and come to Zion with singing,

with everlasting joy on their heads.

They shall obtain joy and gladness;

sorrow and sighing shall flee away.

"I, even I, am He who comforts you.

Who are you that you should be afraid

of a man who will die,

and the son of man who will be made like grass?

And you forget the LORD your Maker,

Who stretched out the heavens

And laid the foundations of the earth;

You have feared continually every day

Because of the fury of the oppressor,

When he has prepared to destroy.

And where is the fury of the oppressor?

The captive exile hastens that he may be loosed,

that he should not die in the pit,

and that his bread should not fail.

But I am the LORD your God,

who divided the sea whose waves roared--

the LORD of hosts is his name.

And I have put My words in your mouth;

I have covered you with the shadow of My hand.

That I may plant the heavens,

Lay the foundations of the earth,

And say to Zion, 'You are my people.'"

(Isaiah 51: 10-16)

Yes, I want to remember well what He's done, lest his providence go uncelebrated in my life. Lest I lose sight of what He's ultimately doing-- that is, planting the heavens here and generally having my back while He establishes his Kingdom around me, despite me, through me.

But then it seems silly to get on here to hammer out words for testifying, for collecting loose insights when it's welding that does the work of securing testimony-- welding I'm powerless to accomplish for myself.

"My son, if you receive my words,

and treasure my commands within you,

So that you incline your ear to wisdom,

and apply your heart to understanding;

Yes, if you cry our for discernment,

and lift up your voice for understanding,

if you seek her as silver,

and search for her as for hidden treasures;

Then you will understand the fear of the LORD,

and find the knowledge of God.

For the LORD gives wisdom;

from His mouth come knowledge and

understanding."

(Proverbs 2: 1-6)

He's refining, you see, and it isn't my job to get on here with shiny words of life lived happily, smoothly, wisely with a little bit of the Lord working below the surface.

My job is to revere the Welder and worship that He provides meaning at all to the fleeting efforts of the hastening exile.

I have put My words in your mouth...

"Come thou fount of every blessing

Tune my heart to sing Thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise.

Teach me some melodious sonnet

Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount, I'm fixed upon it
Mount of Thy redeeming love.

Oh to grace how great a debtor

Daily I'm constraint to be!
Let Thy goodness like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to thee.

Prone to wander Lord i feel it

Prone to leave the God I love.

Here's my heart, Lord, take and seal it.

Seal it for thy courts above."