"Quit that whinin'

...before I give you somethin' to whine about."

It works with cryin', complainin', bickerin', hollerin' ... I've heard this phrase a lot as a child. And as I think about all of the work these next 14 days will require of me, I've decided the whining will stop here. Because the world has enough going on without me adding to the grievous chorus with talk of my hard, hard life full of wonderful family, friends, food, laughter, Jesus, and, oh yeah, the occasional paper and test. Sure finals week is a concentration of the latter, but compared to the former, how in the world do I have cause to complain? "Sadie," you say, "don't keep it all in. You're allowed to be stressed and busy. You can tell us how you're really feeling."

 True. I can. And if you do ask, I'll tell you I have so much to do and feel a little intimidated. But often times I'm not asked and I end up on some tangent about how much I have to do and I completely forget to be uplifting and encouraging to the person I'm with-- who probably has just as much to do. And they're thinking "there she goes, preachin' to the choir, like I don't have a lot on my plate, too." And tensions rise, and people get testy (or examy... oh, too much time around my dad!) and emotions go crazy and I just do not want to add to the chaos. Well at least I don't want to add negatively. 

So I'll take my burdens to you, Jesus. I'll tell you how I'm feeling. And I won't have to worry about how you'll interpret my words or my attitude. You can just know my heart. Like no one else can. As much as I want to support my friends and spend time with them and be what they need, my actions often seem to fail to live up to my intentions. Or my intentions sway with my own fluctuating attitude. Whatever the case, you are the only one familiar with all my ways. And no matter my stress or my feelings, you'll hear me out. You'll know that in my heart all I want is to glorify you. I can't even know what that will look like. But you do. So I'll quit my whinin' and just start praying.

 And where my flat-out complaints of this earth would join a chorus of misery, my prayers will be fine-tuned. Each one will be heard. To this world of suffering, death, wars, revolutions, and starvation, my tests seem so, so miniscule. So to offer my whining would be pointless, pitted up against such vast devastation. But to You, who has the ability to work from, to, and through all things, my test anxiety means something. And even to someone and something so eternally minimal, you offer counsel and meaning. To you my words are not whining, they are the audible confirmation on my part that I believe you can and will do something with the requests I place before you. You take my deepest fears and add them to a chorus of praise for the work of our Heavenly Father. How much sweeter is this tune than the wailing heard the whole earth 'round? Thank you for offering a way to escape such a wretched sound... for giving me a way to voice my concerns in a meaningful way, that I may, in turn, offer condolences and compassion rather than complaints. 

God, you have given me so much. I am so thankful. And out of my gratitude I want to learn to quit my whinin' before you take it all away and give me something to whine about. 

"...Do not be terrified by them, or I will terrify you before them." - Jeremiah 1:17

"You are my God, and I will give you thanks;

you are my God, and I will exalt you.

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;

his love endures forever."

-Psalm 118:28-29